I am thankful of today.I had a good raid.I had a good swim.I got to know that the girl i eye candied already has a boyfriend.I had a good talk with Aris.I found out that Shafni is doing well(he is in politics lol!)I watched the law of attraction that taught me about good feelings and bad feelings.Bad things only happen to you when you think about it.It doesn't matter what you are today coz its the result of your past.You can be whatever you want because nobody told you have to be this or that.When you were born there was no blackboard in the sky telling you what to be.
Good feelings brings about to good thoughts and the easiest way to do that is by doing good actions.When you like people,people will like you back and you will like yourself more!
Monday, April 18, 2011
Friday, September 10, 2010
3 more years before judgement day.
Since i was young i dun think there was ever something or someone i could forward for or to.
I dun remember talking to my father when i was a young kid prolly only my grandfather and mother.In Thailand,zero communication,we are just world's apart.My mum was a retard in bring up a child with moral support.Stepfather was a dumbass to have married my mum.Well my mum is successful really.A kampung girl who did not speak a single word of English to a once business owner and retired at 40 with enough savings to support us.But she is really socially retarded.Maybe that is where i got it from.Well maybe some.If i look back at life now.There's prolly just so little i take dear of.
Money?Car?Alcohol?Girls?Not really.Quite a pity i did not grow up like that coz things will be superficial and simple.
Love life?I seem to screw things up when it comes to that department.Well like there say have or dun have leave it fate anyway there are so many broken hearted people in this world.But think of it on your death bed.Before you die,you think about people.Right now if i die,i know who i gonna think about and its less than 10 people if i eliminate with priority maybe 5 even.
So what's judgment day? Its when i hit 30.There's 3 years now.I do not want to be living with my mother anymore.I need to shift out.That's 1.
I must be financially stable 2.3 hopefully i find my other half.Who i can love wholeheartedly every single day in our own little world.That's not much to ask right?Oh ya i dun wanna be fat and ugly too haha.
Maybe that's why someone i knew hung himself in his room.He was already engaged.Super good looking.Talented with music and arts.But he chose to give up.Maybe he wasn't happy with how things were going?How should i kill myself when i fail i wonder.If i dun live a life i might as well dun waste resources for people who already have a life.I can live but without living a life there is no point.You are just gonna get old,wither away.Like Kurt Cobain said its better to burn out than fade away.BAM!shotgun to the head at 27.I gonna give it till 30.I am a late bloomer =)
I dun remember talking to my father when i was a young kid prolly only my grandfather and mother.In Thailand,zero communication,we are just world's apart.My mum was a retard in bring up a child with moral support.Stepfather was a dumbass to have married my mum.Well my mum is successful really.A kampung girl who did not speak a single word of English to a once business owner and retired at 40 with enough savings to support us.But she is really socially retarded.Maybe that is where i got it from.Well maybe some.If i look back at life now.There's prolly just so little i take dear of.
Money?Car?Alcohol?Girls?Not really.Quite a pity i did not grow up like that coz things will be superficial and simple.
Love life?I seem to screw things up when it comes to that department.Well like there say have or dun have leave it fate anyway there are so many broken hearted people in this world.But think of it on your death bed.Before you die,you think about people.Right now if i die,i know who i gonna think about and its less than 10 people if i eliminate with priority maybe 5 even.
So what's judgment day? Its when i hit 30.There's 3 years now.I do not want to be living with my mother anymore.I need to shift out.That's 1.
I must be financially stable 2.3 hopefully i find my other half.Who i can love wholeheartedly every single day in our own little world.That's not much to ask right?Oh ya i dun wanna be fat and ugly too haha.
Maybe that's why someone i knew hung himself in his room.He was already engaged.Super good looking.Talented with music and arts.But he chose to give up.Maybe he wasn't happy with how things were going?How should i kill myself when i fail i wonder.If i dun live a life i might as well dun waste resources for people who already have a life.I can live but without living a life there is no point.You are just gonna get old,wither away.Like Kurt Cobain said its better to burn out than fade away.BAM!shotgun to the head at 27.I gonna give it till 30.I am a late bloomer =)
Late?
Seriously being reprimanded from someone younger than you is not easy to swallow.
Especially when you know you did not want to be late on purpose.For some reason i did not hear my clock ring at 10am and an accident had to happen on ECP quite a serious one too.They had to block off 2 lanes and the traffic was horrid.
So why do i still care about someone who couldn't wait just 5 minutes more when i was racing towards them.I dunno,usually i couldn't care last.If i can walk away from my own mother what else can't i do?
And its not because i am always late that i do not have girlfriend.I just think girls are retarded.They wanna be treated as equals but its impossible.They should know it themselves.They need things to be romantic,special and be pampered.Seriously too much media is fucking up their brains.So i had enough i am not gonna say anything or do anything.That's what i do best in life.Nothing.
Especially when you know you did not want to be late on purpose.For some reason i did not hear my clock ring at 10am and an accident had to happen on ECP quite a serious one too.They had to block off 2 lanes and the traffic was horrid.
So why do i still care about someone who couldn't wait just 5 minutes more when i was racing towards them.I dunno,usually i couldn't care last.If i can walk away from my own mother what else can't i do?
And its not because i am always late that i do not have girlfriend.I just think girls are retarded.They wanna be treated as equals but its impossible.They should know it themselves.They need things to be romantic,special and be pampered.Seriously too much media is fucking up their brains.So i had enough i am not gonna say anything or do anything.That's what i do best in life.Nothing.
Saturday, July 3, 2010
I am not depressed
Nope i am not depressed or desperate.
I am just sad that life has only this much to offer.
I already have a mental map of where it is heading.
I do not see anything much in it.
You can remain a saint.
You do not gamble,womanize,drink,badmouth people
hurt other people.
Waiting patiently for a well deserved reward
from God.
What if it doesn't happen?
Man created Art and Music to celebrate life and its emotions.
Man created Logic to explain life's bad emotions and why it should not be followed.
I want to unlock life's secrets.A full life.Not only half of it.
To look back and smile.Smile and be carefree of life's necessities
To be a real human.Celebrate humanity with a full soul and spirit.
Or is life just a random collision.Where the correct collision brings a reactive chemistry?
I need a new distraction.
I gonna watch twilight just because Dakota Fanning is in it <3
I hate being at home.
That is where i start thinking about my life.
All the opportunity i did not grasp.
The remaining time i have to live.
What i did not do to live.
What i should do to live.
If i did not have to sleep,i will probably just work for 24 hours a day.
Questions left unanswered.
My cat bugging me to open the door to let her out.
Then few minutes later bugging me to let her in.
Then she climbs and sit on my keyboard like now.
So how?Just carry on like this?
My life is supposed to be special.
And it is supposed to be shared with someone special too.
Maybe i should start drinking every night to skip this part
of my life.
Just hang in there and lay down till you sleep.
Tomorrow is gonna be a better day.
Life's Trap
A person can choose to follow logic or emotions.
Logic - Life will be in black and white.
Emotions - Life will be colouful.
Logic - Life will be boring and predictable.
Emotions - Life will be exciting and unpredictable.
If a fruitful life is living it to the fullest,
Which one do you have to choose?
Logic vs Emotions.
Emotions are unique to each of us.
You cannot explain emotions or make another feel what you feel.
Logic?Yes.You are able to explain to anyone the logic behind it.
Logic forces you to be a perfect person.
Avoid actions that results in illogical behavior.
Emotions makes you do things that are not explainable.
But emotions changes from time to time.
Emotion is associated with mood, temperament, personality and disposition, and motivation.
Logic is the study of reasoning.Logic is used in most intellectual activity, but is studied primarily in the disciplines of philosophy, mathematics, and computer science.
Emotions are humane.Logic is man made.
Even though the logic is correct,emotions will deviate us from the path.
If logic ruled humans,there will be no crime,no bad habits.Life will be perfect.
Do you want a perfect life?Keep in mind that perfect is boring.
Logic - Life will be in black and white.
Emotions - Life will be colouful.
Logic - Life will be boring and predictable.
Emotions - Life will be exciting and unpredictable.
If a fruitful life is living it to the fullest,
Which one do you have to choose?
Logic vs Emotions.
Emotions are unique to each of us.
You cannot explain emotions or make another feel what you feel.
Logic?Yes.You are able to explain to anyone the logic behind it.
Logic forces you to be a perfect person.
Avoid actions that results in illogical behavior.
Emotions makes you do things that are not explainable.
But emotions changes from time to time.
Emotion is associated with mood, temperament, personality and disposition, and motivation.
Logic is the study of reasoning.Logic is used in most intellectual activity, but is studied primarily in the disciplines of philosophy, mathematics, and computer science.
Emotions are humane.Logic is man made.
Even though the logic is correct,emotions will deviate us from the path.
If logic ruled humans,there will be no crime,no bad habits.Life will be perfect.
Do you want a perfect life?Keep in mind that perfect is boring.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
I want you to notice when i'm not around
When you were here before,
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel,
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
I wish I was special
You're so very special
But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here
I don't care if it hurts,
I wanna have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
when I'm not around
You're so very special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here, ohhhh, ohhhh
She's running out the door
She's running out
She run run run run...
run...
Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so very special
I wish I was special
But I'm a creep,
I'm a weirdo
What the hell am I doin' here?
I don't belong here
I don't belong here...
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